I remember my childhood and how my parents handled an off day. Off days were usually days to balance a checkbook, go grocery shopping, watching a baseball or football game, splinting cables scraps to recycle copper (my father was an electrician), or simply watching t.v. No one talked about self-care, let alone know what it was, and how it helps us in our daily routine.

As defined by Raphailia Michael at PsychCentral.com, “self-care is any activity that we do deliberately in order to take care of our mental, emotional, and physical health”. In other words, its doing something that we can find the pleasure in doing, in order to help us feel better about ourselves. Life can get very overwhelming, to the point that we lose focus on who we are, what are we suppose to do with ourselves, and how being our unique selves can help ourselves and others throughout our journey of life.

Is Self-Care hard?

For me, out of my personal experience, heck yeah! I mean, taking the time to focus on myself on things that are pleasurable its an ordeal in itself. I can get fixated easily on a schedule, on tasks, in what I have to hand in, in what I have to do, that at the end of the day, my brain and my soul are exhausted. Add a negative environment, and it becomes straining. So learning how to focus on what makes me fulfilled and happy as a person, and as a mommy, is honestly, a work in process.

Lets take this weekend for example. This weekend was one of the most relaxing weekends that I have had in a while. I spent my time waking myself early to contemplate silence, and drink my coffee, while I listen themes that are concerning to me on YouTube (yes, I’m a YouTube junkie, don’t judge…lol), and finding peace before I started making breakfast. On Saturday, my husband made a large lunch, which made me nap like I haven’t in years. And when I awoke, I just felt contented with the day, regardless on what I have accomplished at home.

Sunday, I had the same quiet time, ate breakfast, planned and went grocery shopping alone, went to Church, ate lunch with my kids and met my mom and sister to see a Children’s play. It seems like I did a lot, but again, I felt contented because, not only did I accomplish my goals for the day, but also, I spent time with family.

This week was the end of a chaotic cycle of the past two weeks, where there were many assignments and projects to hand in. It was stressful for the entire family. And like I said, self-care is a work in process, mainly because, we get so caught up in ourselves and our routine, that we lose focus on ourselves. And losing our focus can affect our relationships, which we should value and cherish as part of our process of improvement.

So… What to do from now on?

As an Improving Mommy, I am learning from my experiences and mistakes. It took me a while to find the help that I needed, to start appreciating the little things and to organize my time in order to keep my sanity. Its a learning process. I don’t have this “down to a T” just yet. I still need to learn to let go, to control my anger, to verbalize my thoughts and feelings, so I still do not have all the answers towards what “self-care” should look like.

But for now, it looks like waking up early in the morning, contemplating the silence of my home, sipping coffee and watching a YouTube video or two of my topic of choice before beginning the day, and coming home to see a clutter-free kitchen, living room and dining room, with food in the fridge. I still have lots to learn.

Have a beautiful day!